"Now, we have a very diverse group to whom I am speaking. This includes young women who are still in school or who are working. You are single. You are hoping to catch that perfect man. I have yet to see one who is perfect. Aim high, but do not aim so high that you totally miss the target. What really matters is that he will love you, that he will respect you, that he will honor you, that he will be absolutely true to you, that he will give you freedom of expression and let you fly in the development of your own talents. He is not going to be perfect, but if he is kind and thoughtful, if he knows how to work and earn a living, if he is honest and full of faith, the chances are that you will not go wrong, that you will be immensely happy." (Pres. Hinckley GC Oct. 2003, "To the Women of the Church).
I remember when this talk was given and I looked back to it many times when I was still single trying to make a decision about marriage. How wonderful it was to read his words again now that I am on the other side. I do have a husband that meets or exceeds what Pres. Hinckley states here. How happy I have been and how much more happiness I do feel as the days, weeks, months and years go by.
Now that we are working on our 3rd year of marriage I can honestly say that it gets better over time. Our first year of marriage was a challenge, and this wasn't because of the two people involved because it wasn't "marital problems". Looking back, there was so much on both of our plates that year. YIKES! I would never recommend taking on the responsibility of 2 new businesses/stores and planning a wedding at the same time. What a challenge it was and what a blessing it has become! We learned and grew closer because of it.
Isn't this picture sweet?
The second year was exceptionally better. I don't know how Jared feels, but it was almost exactly at the 1 year anniversary that I started to notice a change in me, in my love for Jared and our relationship overall. Granted, it was shortly after the 1 year mark that we became aware of a sweet blessing that would be joining our lives nine months later. That in itself had some influence on the changes in me. But I really did recognize a softening of my heart. This probably wasn't noticeable on the outside, as most of us really don't make that big of changes in our lives, but it was something I did feel inside.Again, almost exactly to date, I have felt another change in myself and Jared actually did mention something about this one. I have been more outwardly affectionate to him. I have prayed for it, but that is about all the effort I have made for this change. It is something inside me that is different because I "feel" something different for him. Jared expressed his appreciation for this love that he "needs". In reality, Jared just takes things as they are. He may say that he "needs" love, but he gets around just fine when I am not so nice. His ability to love is above and beyond my abilities. What I have come to notice and have GREAT appreciation for is his never putting me down and continually encouraging me. I confess that I am not programmed this way, as I know is common for many women. We nag, put down, and complain about the men in our lives. I really do not want to be that way because my man deserves every ounce of encouragement, trust, respect, applaud, and praise I have to give. He truly is remarkable in many things, but most of all in his marriage and home life! I am the luckiest, and even more blessed wife.
Now on the mother side of the equation. I LOVE IT! Moments are sometimes challenging for my impatient, over controlling self. But I really don't want to be doing anything else. I love this little guy to pieces and am so grateful that I get to be with him every moment so I don't miss a step. He is learning and growing so much that I would hate to not have the opportunity to relish in every moment! How lucky am I that I have a husband that allows me to stay home, EVEN when he is sick and has a FREE DAY event at the stores (yesterday in Del Mar), he still insists that I be with Corban. I realize I am more equipped to feed him, but Jared can pretty much equal or top anything else it takes to care for our son. But Jared is a man and enjoys being able to take care of his wife and son.
As an example of his ability to care for Corban, Friday night Corban was being difficult in that he was whining and crying because he was overly tired. After about 45 minutes of my insisting that I take care of it, Jared picked him up, held him in his particular way, and5 minutes later our dear Corban had entered dream land. He doesn't get frustrated with Corban, but patient attends to him when he is being difficult. Again, I am so lucky!
What new things are we seeing from Corban? Well, today I took him to the RB store which has a wall of mirrors. I was holding him facing the mirror and he was look about me and give me the huge smiles as usual, but then he saw himself. He would stare and smile at himself more than he would be. He was so fascinated with his image, most likely his own BIG eyes.
When I attend to his crying in the morning, as soon as he sees me his cry turns into talking and big smiles. How great is that! It sure makes me feel loved! We do this a couple of times through the day, just sit together talking, smiling and laughing together. Well, he isn't laughing quite yet, though today I heard a semblance of a laugh, so we are getting there.
He loves watching the TV. No, I am not a bad mother who sets my child in front of the TV. I am a lazy mother that sometimes watches a movie and he watches it with me :) I believe he enjoys the movement and the lights, but I vow to be attentive to my child and not allow him to watch TV until he is over 2 years of age. Until then we will spend our time finding creative play on the floor together. I have a lot to learn!
One last thing that I wanted to write about because it was something I noticed on Friday. Wilson called me regarding an issue with one of the machines in PQ- cockroach infestation. By the time I returned his phone call he had already taken care of what he was calling for. He proceeded to explain to me what was going on. I felt myself wanting to respond with different solutions than he had already chosen to do, but then I suddenly realized that it wouldn't hurt anything to have him just take care of it. He may have caused himself more time, but then maybe not considering what the circumstances were. So the big moment in all of this was my ability to just let things be and completely allow those in charge to be in charge. I was very happy to experience the reaction and hope to have it in the future. We really do have great people working for us and Jared is doing a fantastic job of "chiefing" the operations. I just need to keep my know-it-all self quiet sometimes because they are actually doing better than I did at times.
I am loving the way things are operating, actually. I have seen more ideas come to fruition because we are finally to that point of maturity. I am to the point that I can spend more time "caring" for management- I should do more of it, but it is happening occasionally.
So life is going great! What I wish I had more of was spirituality. I am nervous about this lesson that I will be giving next Sunday because I have been so distant from receiving inspiration in a spiritual sense. I need to do better at reading my scriptures and pouring my heart out in prayer, but I am usually too tired (bad excuse). I really need to make some changes in regards to that priority.
Quick wrap up in what has gone on:
On Wednesday mornings I go to a "Music as a Second Language" class with Corban where we sing and dance with other moms and their children.
I am teaching 2 classes at the gym, 1 Step and 1 Body works
We bought a couch for the living room- $900- we are having it made and it will be delivered in 2-3 weeks.
Nika is still pretty frustrating because she is constantly running away and not obeying any commands I give. She even sometimes ignores Jared.
Jared has been sick this week. Pour guy!
I set off the security alarm today and police came. Not sure why the Security people didn't call us first.
I have started buying fresh chicken when it is on sales. I cook it up and put it in vacuumed bags and store it in the freezer, saving us the money it would cost to buy precooked meat. It makes me feel good!
We are having a grain shortage throughout our economy because of the production of Ethanol from corn. This got me really panicked and so I went to Costco and spend $130 of food storage items. It was quite relieving doing so. Hopefully I remain paranoid and panicked until I have a completely stocked with food storage for a year. How many times have we been commanded to do so?
Gas prices are astronomical! I paid $3.89 on Saturday at Costco.
I am terrified about the upcoming presidential election. I only find comfort in knowing Heavenly Father is watching over us and all we need to do it be obedient.
Our house is coming together a little bit more. We bought a bookshelf off Craig's List for $150 (cost $270 at Target) that we have put in our entry hall. It starting to warm up in here!
We are strongly considering buying Disneyland passes.
Corban is almost growing out of his 0-3 month clothing and working his way into 3-6 month. He is weighing roughly 13 lbs, but I swear his length is really increasing. We have a doctors appointment on Tuesday.
I am weighing 125 lbs, which is roughly 2 lbs less than when Jared and I started Biggest Loser- starting weight 127.9 lbs. Still have a long way to go, but I am not too concerned, so I still eat junk food. I really should watch that more than I do.
I walk occasionally in the mornings with friends at Miramar Lake.
Jared and I are going to get CPR certified this Saturday. I need it for aerobics and Jared just wants it.
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