Setting Sail

Since we will be gone for the next week, I thought it would only be appropriate to leave something to enjoy. Here is his new learned trick:




I guess all that dragging down the stairs actually did teach him. He all of a sudden was coming down by himself. He likes to stop in the middle of the stairs and just stand- that makes me nervous, but he seems to be fine.


Hope to have lots of fun pictures from our next week!

Adventures of Corban

Everyday I have to take Nika on walks to go to the bathroom. Almost everyday Corban comes on at least one of those walks (the other times he is either left with his father, or I just leave him to play in the family room by himself- they are short walks, so don't be too alarmed). When Corban does get to go, he LOVES it! I just carry him because I don't think it is worth pulling out a stroller. From the moment we start walking out the door, he is perched over my shoulder, looking around, smiling, and enjoying the fresh air. He loves it when there is a bit of breeze- he smiles and squints his eyes a bit. Today as we were walking (keeping a steady pace), Nika would stop to smell, and then all of a sudden start running up the hill past us. Corban would just giggle at her every time she did it.
I also just bought him a potty seat. I set him on it at least once a day just for fun. Tonight I thought it would be fun (for me) to see if I could catch him needing to go potty and put him on it at that moment. So I left his diaper off. HA! I went to put the seat on the potty (literally seconds after putting him down) and I come back to him peeing as he is reaching for the button on the DVD player. Needless to say, there was no more pee to go into the potty by the time I grabbed him and rushed him to the bathroom. He wore a diaper the rest of the evening.
About that button on the DVD player (actually the XBOX), he LOVES it! It is the button that ejects the disc, so you hear the disc going in and out. Occasionally you will hear the flipping of the tray as he is grabbing on to it. I am sure I will be sorry in the future, but it really is adorable to watch- he is pretty careful about it- and very precise with the pressing of the button.
He is still so adorable as he is falling asleep. He still does the whining, moaning thing as he is drifting off into slumber land. That is something I will totally miss when he stops. I took a moment tonight to just hold and rock him as he drifted off (while moaning). I couldn't help but think how these moments are flying by. In heaven, I want to come back to this perfect state!

Embarrassed

I am sure that no one has thought a thing of it, but I must make a comment on the subject. With all this commotion of my name being on the "harass" list, the amount of our donation is plastered all over the universe. Something that I thought would have been very personal has now become more than just public. This was first a problem when my employees started getting phone calls and that was one of the key phrases the callers would use, "She donated $XXXX towards hate." Not really something you want your employees to know about you...especially when the hate part is not true.
Well, I am definitely NOT trying to draw your attention to it, but in the case that you are wondering how and why the amount, may I refer you to an earlier post made back in the beginning of this venture. We are not at all as wealthy as we may appear, but Heavenly Father let both Jared and I know what we were to give. I have had to remind myself of that many times as we have been going through this harassment. In addition to the "ouch" factor, had it not have been as big of a donation, we might not be receiving the attention that we have. I am in no way regretting the decision. My prayers were answered. I am grateful for the strength it is giving me- I think it is going to be necessary for the future battles.

Looking on the Brighter side

If you haven't read this article in the Meridian News, then you need to. I think it is shocking, but I also think it is good to be informed. Thank you, Colleen, for sending this to me. Article VI Blog is also another good place to read up on what is happening with the Prop 8 persecutions. Whether for or against, everyone should be able to admit this is persecution and it is wrong.

I am feeling much better today! I have spent my day in the BEST things. After having a great RS presidency meeting, which opened with a great thought, and then we talked about the people in the ward that need visits, and then things I can be doing for my callings. There are many other people have greater trials than what I suffer just right here in my little neighborhood. This reminded me to take action on doing those things that matter most and not waste time reading the negative. By the way, Jacqui, THANK YOU for the wonderful gesture and then compliment on Golden Spoon Comments. This was the only comment that came in today :)
I came home from the meeting and spent some time listening to and reading conference talks. WOW! Those apostles knew just what we needed. I particularly liked Elder Eryings' and Elder Hales' talks, as they put the umph back in my step to love everyone around me! Hales' is particularly applicable to persecutions and makes me so happy that I have a great sister and brother in law that live by this counsel. They both told me right from the beginning that it was best that we don't respond nor engage in conversation with those that are calling to boycott. As tough as that might be, it really is the best way for this particular situation. I can understand, looking at the picture with their understanding, how difficult this must be for them. If only they could see the bigger picture, or have the understanding that we have, then they might believe us when we say that we are not about hate. So many of the other blogs and articles are able to articulate this. My conclusion is that it is best to read uplifting things, not to remain oblivious to the situations around me, but because I do know what is going on and I need powerful support.
I love my Father in Heaven. He does bless you with peace and comfort when nothing else can. He does provide happiness and joy in a time when these emotions seem impossible. What a privilege it is to stand as his witness, especially when it isn't popular. I am very empathetic to all those that continue to suffer. It is so much worse in the emotionally charged areas (Hillcrest, LA, San Fransisco, etc.). I read that even Utah (a state as a whole) is receiving boycotts- all because the opposition doesn't understand that the donated money didn't buy the votes (if so, they would have won).

Corban has had a great day, sliding around on the floor, climbing stairs, unraveling ribbon, napping, and playing at the park. This time on the slide (at the park) he completely went down without help, though I did catch him at the bottom. Right now he is resisting bedtime. Jared came home from work and fed him his bottle...however, he was not successful at getting him to sleep. I guess those daddys are too much fun! So he is back to unraveling ribbon while I finish this blog (I guess he wore daddy out).
All in all, life is great!

I am posting the entire article because I am going to want to read back on it someday (when the link just might not be there):

All photos courtesy of Amy Fisler. Copyright 2008. Amy Fisler. Used by permission. All rights reserved. All Photos are Click to Enlarge.

Editor's Note: As some of you know, Meridian was hacked into last week, apparently by Prop 8 opponents, and in the place of our content was placed a homosexual pornographic film. For free email updates from Family Leader on issues that affect family and religious freedom, click here.

To send this article a friend, click here.

To sign up for a free email subscription to Meridian, click here.

It has been an interesting week.

The Chinese homily, “May you live in interesting times,” has its roots in a curse, not a blessing.

As I said, it has been an interesting week.

The controversy in California regarding Proposition 8 (the proposed amendment to the California constitution defining marriage to be strictly between a man and a woman) built to a frenzy in the days leading up to Tuesday's election and then exploded into anger and violence in the aftermath of Prop 8's slim passage into law.

I am a Los Angeles Police Department detective supervisor running a sex crimes unit covering the western quarter of the city, which also includes the area where the Los Angeles temple is located. I have a fantastic crew of 20 detectives who are an amazing mixture of races and sexes. I have several detectives who are openly gay or lesbian. This orientation has nothing to do with their efficiency as investigators. I deeply respect and like these individuals. I enjoy working with them. My life is often in their hands when we serve high risk search or arrest warrants. I trust them implicitly.

Obviously, the types of crimes we investigate bring us into regular contact with victims who are of an alternative lifestyle orientation. It is incumbent upon us that our compassion for these victims be no less than for victims who are heterosexual.

Hard Choices

Working in such an environment, I found taking a position on Proposition 8 to be difficult. Even though I chose to follow the direction of our Church leaders in my voting decision, it was extremely hard for me to place myself on the line when it came to actively working to ensure the passage of Proposition 8.

Still, I watched in amazement as my fellow ward and stake members worked tirelessly, committing themselves full-heartedly to the cause – not out of homophobic hatred, but out of a love of Christ and a belief in the sanctity of traditional marriage. Their faith strengthened mine, and I committed to participate in a sign waving public rally sponsored by our stake to be held at a local intersection.

By following through on this commitment, I found I had a greater stake in the battle than I had ever thought. I learned a number of hard and harsh lessons. And in the events following the election and passage of Proposition 8, I felt great anguish forcing me to drop to my knees in prayer – eventually coming to a more personal understanding of the Love of Christ and what he expects from me.

During the Proposition 8 rally, as I stood with my wife and friends waving Yes On 8 signs and waving to the passing rush hour traffic, I learned several things. I learned supporters of both Yes On 8 and No On 8 liked to honk their horns. I learned the way to tell the difference is the No On 8 supporters usually accompanied their horn honking with an obscene gesture or a string of obscenities. They also liked to swerve their cars toward the children on the curb.

I learned when we didn't engage in argument with the No On 8 supporters who intermingled with us in the intersection, they became enraged, red faced, and fit to burst.

I have no doubt Yes On 8 supporters both from our church and other churches engaged at some point in the shouting matches during the numerous rallies and demonstrations across the state. However, on the evening of my participation, I was amazed by the cool and non-confrontational way the Yes On 8 supporters conducted themselves.

I learned at the rally several of our ward members had received hate mail after their names, religious affiliation, contribution mounts, and addresses were published on a website inciting No On 8 supporters to target the listed individuals. Their houses and cars had been vandalized, their campaign support signs stolen, and opposition signs planted in their place.

When I returned home after the rally, I had a huge headache and my stomach was in knots. I am not a fan of confrontation, and the noise of the horn honking, both pro and con, and the divisive atmosphere inherent in the volatile situation had taken its toll. Still, after praying with my wife, I felt calmer and was pleased we had chosen to participate. While our efforts were miniscule compared to the hours of service to the cause provided by others, we had at least jumped down from the fence and done something.

Then I saw the latest No On 8 television commercial.

Tolerance?

Supposedly produced by an independent group not affiliated with the official No On 8 campaign, the thirty second commercial spot shows two scruffy male white actors portraying Mormon missionaries who force their way into the well-kept home of a married lesbian couple.

“Hi, we're from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints,” one says.

“We're here to take away your rights,” says his companion.

The missionaries then rip the wedding rings from the women's fingers and ransack the house until they find the women's marriage license, which they destroy.

“Hey, we have rights,” one of the women says.

“Not if we can help it,” answers a missionary.

Moving outside the residence, one of the missionaries smugly says, “That was easy.”

Flexing his muscles, his companion asks, “What do we want to ban next?”

While I was appalled by the commercial, I was even more appalled both MSNBC and The Comedy Channel happily took money to broadcast this overtly hate filled vignette. I cannot imagine a similar commercial, targeted at any other religious or racial group, not being considered a hate crime with a civic outcry for prosecution.

My hackles were beginning to rise in a distinctly unchristian way. However, the fun was just beginning.

Election Day And Aftermath

Election day in California saw numerous No On 8 activists distributing literature and vocalizing at polling sites in clear violation of election laws. Police were called, 100 yard distances from the polling places were paced off, yet the agitation continued.

Despite these efforts, Proposition 8 obtained a slim majority (52.5% to 47.5%). Exit polls showed the proposition was supported by 7 of 10 Black voters, a majority of Latino voters, and by people with children under the age of 18 still at home. Clearly, it was supported by all people who believed marriage is a special and protected institution.

The day after the election, spontaneous protests sprung up in West Hollywood – a small residential community, with a large gay and lesbian population, located within Los Angeles County , but just outside Los Angeles city borders. The protests did not have a particular focus or target other than outrage as they strayed outside the confines of West Hollywood and into Beverly Hills , Hollywood , and West Los Angeles . Several arrests were made, but the seething anger at the passage of Proposition 8 was not dampened.

On Thursday, however, two days after the election, rumors began to be picked up by LAPD of a large protest organized by gay and lesbian activists and their supporters to be staged outside the Los Angeles LDS temple on Santa Monica Boulevard in West Los Angeles.

LAPD has 22 geographic Areas divided between 4 administrative Bureaus . My investigative unit is attached to Operations-West Bureau – which has responsibility for the area where the Los Angeles temple grounds are located. We operate out of a squadroom across from the Bureau's administrative offices. In such proximity, I was in a position to observe the command post set up in the Bureau offices to monitor the actions of the field command post charged with keeping the already illegal (no permits) protest peaceful.

What I learned by watching and listening shouldn't have surprised me, but it did. During my 30+ year tenure, the LAPD as an organization has made great professional strides in the internal battle against sexual harassment, sexual orientation harassment, and racism. While there are still those in civil liberty organizations who contest we are still guilty of racially profiling on the streets (difficult to imagine when our department is so thoroughly integrated at this point in time), organizationally there is little or no tension remaining in these areas.

In the Bureau command post there was a large screen television displaying scenes from the protest outside the Los Angeles temple. Imagine my surprise, when angry protestors began rushing the closed temple gates, and I heard an officer in the command post say, “I hope they burn that place to the ground.”

Imagine my even stronger surprise when another officer replied, “They better hope they don't get through the gates, because the Mormons have an army in a bunker under the temple that will come out and kill them all.”

Really? My temple recommend must not be of a high enough clearance to get me into that part of the temple.

I'm now doing a slow burn. Not only am I watching a sacred building under siege from 2,500 angry people shouting, “ SEPERATION OF CHURCH AND HATE,” and carrying signs proclaiming MORMON HATERS and LOVE NOT HATE, I'm listening to other police officers who agree with the protestors or have the most imaginative fantasies about blood atonement armies hidden under the temple (exactly how do we feed them, drill them, get them in and out without anybody seeing, or are they all in a state of suspended animation until needed?).

I want to emphasize these were not officers or detectives from my own unit – who are all aware of my Mormon faith. Those in my unit who disagree with me over this issue are respectfully tolerant, as I am respectfully tolerant of their opposite beliefs. Tolerance, as Orson Scott Card recently pointed out, is indicative of disagreement. It is not a battle we choose to fight amongst ourselves. Most of us have known each other for a long time and are either embracing of, or oblivious to, our differences – divisiveness has no place in the types of investigations we conduct.

The Mob

The worst, however, was yet to come. The temple presidency made a decision to close the temple for the evening. The right decision, but since when do we as Americans stand by – no matter what our religion – while access to a place of worship is forced to close down because of aggressive outside influences?

The late local news showed scenes of several Hispanic females in tears outside the temple trying to remove the signs desecrating the walls and fences surrounding the temple. As these individuals – who according to a temple spokesperson were not church members – removed the hate-filled signs, the mob exploded and began beating the individuals to the ground. Police intervened and arrests were made, but the fact this was allowed to happen at all was appalling.

Other supporters of Yes On 8 drove slowly by the protestors with Yes On 8 signs attached to their cars and pickups sparking other violent confrontations.

A friend of mine, watching the same scenes play out on the television, called and said he felt like he wanted to go down to the temple with a baseball bat and begin swinging at the demonstrators. I must admit, the natural man in me agreed.

In actuality, the scenes on the television, literally drove me to my knees in prayer for the safety of the temple, the members, and our church. A lesson I have learned several times before, caused me to expand my prayers to include those who were opposing us for they are not our enemies – they are our brothers and sisters in Christ.

The Appropriate Response

In the face of hatred, how are we to feel about this focused attack upon our church? An attack launched not because we are the only supporters of Proposition 8, but because we have been the most visible and financially supportive entity in the battle. We are an easy target.

In a recent article on Christian Courage , Elder Robert D. Hales of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles wrote, “I would say that one of mortality's great tests comes when our beliefs are questioned or criticized. In such moments, we may want to respond aggressively – to put up our dukes . But these are important opportunities to step back, pray, and follow the Savior's example. Remember, Jesus Himself was despised and rejected by the world. And in Lehi's dream, those coming to the Savior also endured ‘mocking and pointing … fingers' (1 Nephi 8:27). ‘The world hath hated [my disciples],' Jesus said, ‘because they are not of the world, even as I am not of the world' (John 17:14). But when we respond to our accusers as the Savior did, we not only become more Christlike, we invite others to feel His love and follow Him as well.

“To respond in a Christlike way cannot be scripted or based on a formula. The Savior responded differently in every situation. When He was confronted by wicked King Herod, He remained silent. When He stood before Pilate, He bore a simple and powerful testimony of His divinity and purpose. Facing the moneychangers who were defiling the temple, He exercised His divine responsibility to preserve and protect that which was sacred. Lifted up upon a cross, He uttered the incomparable Christian response: ‘Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do' (Luke 23:34).”

We have often been instructed to love our enemies, and despite the current horror of our trials, this is no time to do differently.

As I write this (Friday, November 7, 2008), plans are being made by the LAPD to respond to another larger protest/demonstration being planned by No On 8 supporters to be staged in front of the Los Angeles temple on Saturday.

This is interesting since Saturday is my stake's day in the temple. For some weeks now, we have been encouraging families to come together to the temple on Saturday to participate in ordinances.

How do we respond to hatred disguised by the adversary as tolerance? Our stake president has talked to the temple presidency who has assured him the temple will be open for business as usual. There are eight weddings scheduled on the grounds. Will we be able to get to the temple without being molested or our vehicles vandalized? We must place our faith in the Lord and proceed.

Challenges to our faith are not new. Nor are they likely to go away anytime soon. But, as Elder Hales reminds us, “True disciples of Christ see opportunity in the midst of opposition. We can take advantage of such opportunities in many ways: a kind letter to the editor, a conversation with a friend, a comment on a blog, or a reassuring word to one who has made a disparaging comment. We can answer with love those who have been influenced by misinformation and prejudice – who are ‘kept from the truth because they know not where to find it' (D&C 123:12). I assure you that to answer our accusers in this way is never weakness. It is Christian courage in action.”

Lessons Learned

Clearly there are lessons to be learned from the current unrest:

Tolerance is not agreement and should not be a one way street. However, we must still remain tolerant of those who are intolerant of us.

Recognize the adversary at work here – making good seem bad and evil seem good.

We can only be disciples of Christ when we respond to adversity in a Christlike manner. To do less opens our actions to the influence of the adversary and hurts us even more.

We should never take for granted the opportunities we have to gather together in worship. We should never put off the opportunity to attend the temple. For these valuable things can be disrupted and possibly even closed to us – if not permanently, then at least on a temporary basis.

Pray. Often. Don't forget to include those who are set against you.

And finally, have no doubt President Monson knows where all of this is leading. He will surely reveal the knowledge to us on the Lord's timetable. Meanwhile, we must support and trust him, his inspired councilors, and our inspired local leaders in our actions. Their actions of Christian courage will be our examples.

Yep, still hard

I guess it is my fault for thinking hard should only last a few months, really hard should only last two weeks, and the hardest thing I have ever been through should only last a week. I haven't quite hit a week, but I don't see an end in sight.
Heather calls me today asking how my day is going. Of course I knew what she was referring to since we have called each other EVERY day and sometimes 2 times a day to support one another through this harassment. (There is just something about men being able to handle these things. Both our husbands are able to smile through this.) Today I honestly answered her, "My day is going good. How about yours?" I guess it shouldn't have been surprising her response, but I had stayed away from the computer for the morning and was pretending that life was back to normal. Apparently the other side (those against Prop 8) are still working 24/7 to dig up any and all dirt they can find. And if they don't find it in you, they find it in somebody really close to you, and somehow relate it back to you- with the details all twisted. There is a new thing going around on Roger about an article he didn't even write. Oh, the annoyance!
I know I have no room telling people how they should react when they hear what we are going through here in California, but this is my blog, so I will say what I think. I don't feel that it is an outsider's job to tell us we should have compassion on the other side (I am not particularly talking about the 1st Presidency, as I would take this as counsel and I know this is exactly what our Father in Heaven would like us to do). It is really hard to hear, "It could be worse", "you just need to love them", or "they just don't understand." The best reaction to have is something to the tune of compassion and understanding for us, acknowledgement that THEY are the ones displaying hate, or just plain sympathy. No need to fear that you would be condoning our wallowing in our misery. We are pretty strong cookies- as we have been baking in this for the past few months. We just have to allow the sparks to fly often or we will burn from the inside out! We are doing our best to react in a way we have been taught- with love, understanding, and compassion for our enemies. Have faith in us that we are praying for that love and compassion on these people who don't share our same views (or morals) and are lashing out in pure hatred. I promise I am praying for this and I (and everyone else) could really use your prayers as well! I am not at all claiming to the worst off! I can't imagine the pain others must be going through. If I would have been to the LA Temple the day of the protests, I can only imagine the fear that would have put into me. It was bad enough walking out of my door on Saturday afternoon (after a wonderfully uplifting morning of crafts and discussions) to have a car drive by with a guy hanging out the window yelling belligerent comments. He didn't stop at one, but kept going until they (or I) were out of sight over the hill. YIKES! I thought my home was my safe haven. I guess I will have to stay inside.

It is so hard to not be outwardly defensive against these people boycotting the stores. Here are a few of the complaints (my defense in between) that are being sent in to the stores corporate office:

Our family and many of our friends will not be frequenting your establishment in the future.
Equal rights means equality for everyone!
You could have donated your $XXXX dollars to a battered women's shelter to actually help someone. Instead, you donated to promote hate by allowing Prop 8 to pass. A lot of gay/lesbians eat frozen yogurt, but a lot will not be spending their money at your establishment.
A former customer.

Have they even thought to look into where I have donated money. If they want to specifically talk about the business, we have donated well over that amount THIS YEAR to causes I would say are similar to a battered woman's shelter! A majority of my personal donations go through the church. If they knew much about the Mormon church, they would find that 100% of the donations made go to the cause. The humanitarian efforts are one of the first at any catastrophe.

To Whom It May Concern:

I enjoy your yogurt very much and have been a customer for over 3 years. It is with regret that I inform you that I will no longer be patronizing the Golden Spoon located in Poway, CA after learning that the owner, Amanda Crane, donated $XXXX to the yes on 8 campaign. I would ask that you seriously consider the future of your business relationship with Ms. Crane. Golden spoon is in the frozen yogurt business and shouldn't be involved in perpetrating hate crimes against a group of people merely seeking equal recognition under the law.

Sincerely,
Amanda Lee

That's right, Golden Spoon is in the frozen yogurt business and that is where they will stay. It was a PERSONAL donation, not a donation made by the company. Little do ANY of these people know that I am not the only owner, but it is made up of 5 owners, some of which don't agree with Prop 8, therefore, they are hurting their own side (owners and employees) with this type of boycott.

Subject: Boycott of XXXXX XXXXXX

It has come to my attention that XXXXXX XXXXXX (owner of parent business) of XXXXX XXXXX XXXXXX, Inc. and Amanda Crane (my local, Poway XXXX XXXXX Franchise) have donated substantial amounts of money to the "Yes On Prop 8" campaign in California.
Armed with this information I will no longer be a Golden Spoon customer. I will also be letting my friends and colleagues know this information as well.
Prop 8 isn't about gays or marriage or church. It's about the rights of ALL people and the ability of the government to dictate those rights. This is a slippery slope. Where might this slope lead to?

Thank you.

A favorite line that I have heard recently spoken to a gay man was this: "You have all the same rights that I do. You can get married to a woman just like any other man can." Of course if they know any of the arguments on our side, they have nothing to do with equal rights, nor wanting to take away rights from anyone. Our objective is to save traditional marriage, which we believe saves the family, which then saves the individual. It is unfortunate that the judges unlawfully gave them that right for a few months, so now it can be argued that that right is being taken from them.
We have used the "slippery slope" analogy on our side as well. The slippery slope we see is that marriage is not what they want. There is more to the agenda, which is how we got here. Where do you draw the line on marriage if it isn't between a man and a woman? Teenagers? Multiple wives? Sodomy? Relations with animals? And I would like to hear the argument of how this won't be taught in schools, when "marriage" have been chosen to be taught in schools by 95% of the districts in California?

And then there was this one:

I'm sorry that some folks in California are targeting you for boycotts. My family and I will increase our patronage of your stores in the near future until this blows over. The store in Poway, CA is the one we usually frequent.

I will also spread the word to others to increase their patronage.

Warm regards,

J. Drew
Poway, C

This person deserves a medal for making my day! Yippee! There are still kind words to be spoken!
Thank you to all of you who want to do everything in your power to keep our business going in Poway! I wish we could afford to just give you all Free Yogurt because you deserve it!
Thank you Heather and Roger and Kids for coming down yesterday! It was a nice break and it is always great to spend time with family. I can't wait for our much needed vacation in less than two weeks!

Another first

We really enjoyed the park today...and we only went because I had to have a meeting with Kim Garcia for Enrichment. I started out thinking that the reason I don't go to Play Group is because my child is not ready to play. He proved me wrong today. He LOVED the sand. I took his shoes off and he played in the sand with his toes, allowed it to filter through his fingers, and crawled all around the sand box. I only had 1 incident with him trying to eat the sand- he got down on his belly and put his face in it, much like he does in the bathtub to taste the water. He is a weird child. As you see in the video, we also tried out the slide. He really was pushing himself off.

This Test is getting harder

I have yet to feel a desire for celebrating the passing of Prop 8. I know there are many reasons for this, and after discussing them out loud, the best answer I can give is that I think I have a hint of what our Father in Heaven feels for his children when they choose an opposing path to the plan of salvation. I have seen and studied so much on the subject of Same Sex Marriage over the past 3 months, which was disheartening to say the least. But it wasn't until this last week that I really realized who the opponent was we were up against. This group, and I really feel it is important to refer to them as a group, is more hateful than I would have imagined otherwise friendly individuals to be. I don't really have words for it, which is better anyway because I don't want to sound like I am casting judgement. The only point I am trying to get across is the way I am feeling after a successful campaign.
I know I didn't realize how bad this would get in the beginning, though I did expect it to be bad. It is a different trial of faith than I had expected. In a way I am grateful because I know it is making me strong because I am going to have to be stronger. But that also brings forth the reality that this is just the beginning.
Unfortunately, for a split second I thought about Corban and my unborn children and how I don't dare bring them into this ugly world. Then I reminded myself (or He reminded me) that those children have been prepared for this time. I actually need their strong spirits to help me through this. So bring on the babies!
In the middle of this post I received a phone call and I had a feeling I shouldn't answer it since I didn't recognize the number. The message said the following:

Hi, I am looking for an Amanda Crane. I got a message on my cell phone today
that you had donated $...... to the Yes on 8 campaign. I'd just like to
confirm that before I forward it to about 280 phone mail messages and to all the
email addresses on my San Diego list. My name is David and my phone number is
619-295-5478. I just like to get confirmation before I do something like that.
That it is either indeed true or not true. Thank you!

Boy was I glad I didn't answer it! I can't believe the attacks and intimidation that are coming from that side. Still! They are really sore losers. It makes me think of sports games and the lesson of sportsmanship. I guess these people haven't had much experience with that- or they are teaching that lesson different from when I learned it. If their point is that we, Yes on 8, are bigots and are so hateful, then why are they fighting this so called battle with the same? If I were an outsider without a position on the matter, their actions would really leave me to think. But people have been raised to think differently now, so what is right, is no longer right, what is moral no longer matters, what is law is fought in the name of individual justice. I thought that when we vote, the majority gets to decide the end. Apparently it just gives reason to put forth another lawsuit.
All joking aside, I really do feel bad about what is going on. I feel bad that this has hurt them to the point that they are lashing out in this way. I feel bad that they hold all this anger towards a very loving people. I feel bad that they are vindictive against individuals they don't know the slightest about. What does an amount of money say about a person? Does it tell them that I have a little boy that can melt the heart of anyone? Does it tell them who I am and who I am striving to become? Does it tell them that I too think there are injustices in this world? Does it tell them that I truly do strive to love my neighbor and my enemy? Does it tell them the hard days that I have experienced or the things that bring me great joy? Does it tell them that I make mistake? Does it tell them the accomplishments I have made in my life? Does it even tell them the REASON why I donated the money? Nope, it has no ability to explain any of these things.
I heard from an individual today that was picketing at the LDS temple in LA that "this is not a personal attack on the members of the church." I dare say it is. I do recall hearing my name personally on that cell phone message. I do believe that was MY employee calling ME to tell ME that he has had multiple calls for AMANDA CRANE about her donation to Yes on 8 and they are going to ruin my business. I did get a personal "heads-up" from GS corporate preparing me for the flood of emails that have come in due to my donation. Maybe I am a little paranoid.
It's just the beginning.

Prop 8 Child Abusers

We didn't witness abusers, we were the abusers!

Well, I didn't actually get accused of this because Yanina Luna was standing right by Corban, so she was blamed. Here is how it went:
A young/middle-aged lady walked up to us while we were waving signs at the Carl's Jr. corner. Speaking to Yanina, she said with a kind tone, "Can I ask you a question about your sign?" She proceeded to ask (I am not sure whether Yanina gave her the go ahead, or if she just broke out with the question), "What does Prop 8 have to do with religion?" (At this point I took a closer look at the button on her shirt, which was for Obama- just an observation as to where this was headed)
I was unable to hear the response, but whatever it was, it was WRONG...at least according to this lady. She then said, "I am majoring in Philosophy with a minor in Religion." That's an oxymoron if I ever heard one. That has got to be a frustrating education. "Nowhere in the bible does it say marriage between a man and a woman." I guess that statement is true, because it isn't said in that exact way; however, I don't know that it could be interpreted any other way. Granted, it might matter what version of the bible you are studying. I am no scriptorian, and there are probably better references, but in Matthew 19:4-9 it gives the marriage law:

4 And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female,
5 And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?
6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
7 They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcememt, and to put her away?
8 He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.

I read it as speaking of man and woman. It didn't preface the scripture with "heterosexual marriage is such..." It is spoken as if there is no question as to who marries who. But it is very good at pointing out gender- male and female. Huh. And the discussion here was actually going on to teach about divorce, which was not from the beginning, either. So that has been a man made situation because of hard hearts. I guess we need a new scripture for our day speaking of the homosexual's case...and the even harder hearts we are dealing with. No accusation intended.

Needless to say, this ladies tone had changed from kind to angry and hateful. She began to accuse us of child abuse- she said it many times, so I do believe she really meant it- she was pointing fingers and calling us all sorts of names, which included hateful, discriminatroy, . She was spouting about our God and how we should hope he is forgiving of our hate. Liz nicely asked her why she was so angry, but the lady wouldn't hear it. While walking away she rhetorically asked, "Why are you so fearful." There it is again, we are a fearful people.

Interesting. Child abuse, huh? Huh.

So I pondered that situation wondering how it could have been dissolved. Two ideas I came up with- she asks if she can ask a question, you reply back, "Only if I can give you a compliment first." With this one you would have to be on your toes as to what great, sincere compliment you can give. It definitely would need to be spoken with deep sincerity. The other idea would be to say, "Not if it is rhetorical." The point of this one is that they don't really want you to answer their question. They want to be given the chance to tear you down. You are crazy if you think they actually want to listen. That's not to say that there aren't those who are willing to listen; however, they don't normally approach you in this fashion. Oh, and one more, you say, "Is it a question, or would you like to exercise your freedom of speech for the opposition?" This isn't to shut them up, it is more to have them MAYBE think about how you are out there exercising your freedom of speech, not necessary committing a hate crime, and she is welcome to as well.

The best thing about it, traffic was stopped at a light on the side of the road she was standing, and just as she finished the light turned green and we got SOOO many honks. They were mostly from cars that were there witnessing the mad lady.

If any of you readers come up with more POSITIVE come backs (not ones that cut them down), please leave a comment.

These boys look happy to me! But what do I know, I am one of the abusers.

So this is Our boy

Here is a not so great video of an oh so adorable, jibber-jabbering boy. He has recently started to make a lot more consonant sounds, and he does so in a slight whisper. He does this all day around the house as he goes about his business.

The mess in the backgroud in usual for our house. I don't seem to mind stuff laying around the house. Dirt is another story.

I got some pots and pans from IKEA the other day, knowing he would enjoy making noise with them. He does, but he happens to like this utensil in particular. It now joins us at our sign waving for entertainment, though it didn't work there quite as well as it does at home.

The picture was taken yesterday when Indy Ryan was over playing with us. We had lots of fun...or at least they did. Everything Indy was doing, Corban would want to be right there with him.

So here is a list of ten things about Corban that I absolutely adore as I have been able to share his life with him for the last 10 months:

1. The beautiful baby blue eyes! It is always exciting to see what color they will become from those dark grey eyes they are born with. I couldn't be happier with what he got! I am just hoping there isn't a change as he gets older. But even if there is, his eyes are so big that they will be beautiful no matter what.

2. His ever so cheerful personality. In the first two months of life I thought I had a child that was going to be real needy, requiring a lot of attention. I am sure that is what ever first-time mom thinks because they have never had someone depend so much on them. As soon as Corban had a way of expressing himself, it was apparent he was a very happy, easy going child. I wish this upon every first-time mom because he makes me want to have a dozen! He does cry, but it is definitely to communicate, I can usually figure it out, and it isn't very often.

3. His thick little body. To girls, the word thick, as it relates to the body, is usually taken as an insult, but I have since been informed by men (Jared) that it is meant as buff, strong, and having muscles and definition. Corban has definitely got a thick body in that way. Thanks to his dad, Corban has maintained his upper body strength, still being able to do pull ups on your fingers. This may soon be a bad thing, as he is also getting coordinated with his legs, so climbing out of his crib is right around the corner.

4. His desire for independence. Now of course this one has it's drawbacks, especially when it comes to sitting quietly in church. But for the other 6 days of the week this bodes well for the mother. He is a busy little boy. He loves playing on his own, exploring every area of the house, getting into everything at his level except for the toy baskets (unless we are talking about Nika's toy basket). He is currently working on walking, which is not an independent task for now, but soon will be. The second you grab his fingers and say lets go, he is satisfied. He sticks his little tongue out, puts a big smile on his face, and together we walk- him slapping his feet out in front (sort like a soldier would walk). And he now actually turns around to go down our one step in the entryhall instead of taking it front on. It's something new everyday!

5. His friendly demeanor. He has no problem going to other people. In fact, he prefered the Turner's over me at the ward Halloween party. He smiles at everyone...unless he is sleepy...which brings me to the next one:

6. His charming smile. This boys really knows how to work it with the ladies, or anyone for that matter. His smile has probably cost me lots of time considering all the people we stop and entertain when we are out running errands. This goes hand in hand with the friendly trait because he will keep it going just because he is getting Ooo's and Ahhh's from someone. Right now he has 6 teeth to show off with that smile.

7. His effortless schedule. This was another thing I was worried about in the beginning because I couldn't seem to figure out his schedule. Now he is fairly predictable- predictable enough for me. He has no problem running errands with me. He is fabulous in the car. He is pretty good about taking naps during the day, though it sometimes takes convincing if he is having a good time playing. At night time, he is usually really easy to put down for bed.

8. His non-stop little voice. He has forever been a "talker". He has moaned himself to sleep from day one. He rarely is playing without talking. He hums, chatters, yells, and laughs. I will throw in here his contagious laugh. Getting him to laugh, which is no task at all, just makes my day. There is kind of a giggle to it, along with a sigh at the end. Oh, I love that!

9. His playfullness. He can find a way to play with just about anything. But most adorable is his desire to play with Nika. He loves his dog! He has apparently learned a thing or two from her.Bathtime is another one I have mentioned before. He really doesn't play that much with toys, so it is a good thing we haven't bought very many. He likes real things: books (BOM being his favorite because the pages are so easy to thumb (what I mean by that, and I couldn't think of a word, is that he keeps the book closed and just flips the edges of the pages over and over again), phones (whose child doesn't), TV equipment, shadows (that is a funny one to watch), hangers, laundry baskets, magazines, paper of any sort, and the list goes on. Last of all, he loves to BOUNCE. If you get him going, there is laughing right along with the bouncing, but no matter what it comes with the smile.

10. His sweetness! He is such a sweetheart. When I am feeding him, he will rub along my arm, or shirt, or a blanket if I have it near. I am sure it is that he likes the soft textures, but it seems so gentle of him. He smiles at me whenever I walk into the room. He loves and cuddles Nika (this goes with tackling). In the morning when we have him in bed with us, he will wake the other one up by crawling on top of you. If you are getting him out of bed, his face lights up when you come within view...he does this for Nika, as well. He snuggles, gives hugs (in a baby sort of way), enjoys kisses, hangs on my leg when he wants me, and pats me when I hold him. I sure am lucky to be his mom!

Too late!

I am almost 2 hours too late to remember that Corban is exactly 10 months old! Man I love this kid! And this is all I get to post about it because he is making noise as if he wants a bottle or out of his crib. I am going to hope for the first because it is my bed time.

Proud to be LDS

Oh Liz, you have me hooked on your blog! For the rest of you, you should check it out for professional photography, fabulous writing, or for links to more of my favorite subject, Prop 8. I have been reading Article VI Blog, which I find to be very enlightening, entertaining, and yes, a supporter of my beliefs. In reading some comments, I came across one that said almost perfectly something that has become more real to me in the last week or so. Here was the comment:

1. JLFuller on 25 Oct 2008 at 11:33 am #

   It goes with the territory (meaning, being Mormon). We all knew what we were getting into before we came here. We knew Satan would do what you see happening now but we came anyway because of our commitment to Father and Christ. We knew that many of our number would fall away because of their choice to follow the ways of the world. Satan has used these same tactics since the founding of this earth and likely before so few should be surprised. He would make evil seem good and good seem to be evil. He would turn families against each other and split some from the rest. Even the most stalwart and committed would be corrupted and fall away and so some have. The most troubled of us should remember that we cannot serve two masters, God and Mammon.

   This is a war. It continues from our pre-mortal life. It is and always has been Satan against God and we are in the middle. We knew we would be. Again we again have to choose. There has always been a battle ground. There has always been some human weakness that Satan uses where he can squeeze in to separate us from Father. This time homosexuality is the battleground. It will be something else next time. It has always been good versus evil and right versus wrong. It has always been about taking us from God.

In my recent experience this has been much more apparent, like the difference between black and white. The mockery of righteousness; the rejection of truth; the division of good and evil. Just months ago I could have tried to fathom how bad things could be, how our lives could at all be compared to those of the pioneers, how life could really be a test of faith in our days. I now have a hint of those fathoms. Seeing church members claim to be in good standing in the church, while opposing Proposition 8, of which the Apostles and Prophet have asked us to support in no uncertain terms. Hearing of individuals losing friends over professing their support of Proposition 8. Experiencing first hand the dichotomy of equality for marriage and equality for religion/parental rights/and most of all speech. Having everyone of our statements be turned around or taken completely out of context and considered "lies" (while truth doesn't seem to be their- the opponents'- strength).
Now I understand why we are to practice our religion everyday. I understand why we as saints meet often. I understand why we are to continually be converted. I understand why there are two sides of preparedness, both physical and spiritual.
I hear them, the opposition, say that we are using fear as our tactic. We are "crazy", "fearful" people. Well, really I am not full of fear in a way they might think. I am becoming more "fearful", or should I say respectful, of my God, our God. I know he lives and watches over us. He doesn't like that we have some of the reactions that we do just as much as he doesn't like that the other side is doing horrible things. He desires that we have greater love for one another, a hope in all that IS true, and greater faithfulness in him, all so he can give us eternal happiness. I can do a lot better at loving my neighbor, including those that "discriminate" against me. I can do better at being obedient to his commandments. I can do better on a whole lot of things, and that really should be where I focus my energy that I have been spending on trying to convince the other side of who we really are (more in my mind or on the streets while waving signs than actively seeking out opportunities).
On the Article VI Blog they have an article on how the Mormons are being targeted, called Proposition 8:Open season on Mormons? In this it talks about digging up any dirt on Mormons that made large contributions to Prop 8. As I read that my thoughts were directed to my life and whether or not they would find garbage on me. I can't think of any that would be so notable, but maybe they could work it so it was. So then I thought about all those that have had a past that has been forgiven, yet will be brought to the table as if there has been no change in that person. And this is all done in the name of Equality For All. I just don't get it. Nevertheless, it moves me to be more stalwart in my efforts of obedience and righteousness to the kingdom of God. Not out of fear of the people, but out of fear for my God.
I am grateful for the blessing that have been bestowed upon me, and I should be more grateful. I am grateful that I have a place of refuge from the battle grounds. I am grateful that I have support all around me and I don't have to battle this one alone. I am grateful for a wonderful family, both extended sides, and my small nuclear one. I am grateful for the innocence of my sweet Corban that reminds me why this is worth fighting for. I am grateful for the unity of my ward family. I am grateful for a Father in Heaven that grants me peace whenever I remember to ask for it. I am grateful that I have a testimony of God the Father and his son, Jesus Christ.

So I am not reading any more blogs until I write in my own. I get so hooked on other people's lives, I stop recording my own. Quite a lot has gone on since my last post and I am really tempted to talk about Prop 8...but I don't know that I have anything new to say, so it will suffice it to say we have spent more time on the corners in Rancho Penasquitos.


We do have more going on in our lives besides Prop 8, not much, but at least something. On Saturday there was the Annual Combined Ward Halloween Party. Jared signed up to make Chili for the traditional chili contest. He said that he was going to make it this time because he has never made it before but he thought he could do a pretty good job. I guess he was disappointed that we didn't win with my chili last year. Anyway, I had full confidence in his abilities to make a delicious chili, however, I worried a little bit about the time he had available to throw it together. At about 8:30 on Friday night I asked if he was still planning on making chili, or if he wanted me to go ahead and do- this being asked as I am pulling out all the basic chili ingredients and the crock pot to throw them into. He consented to getting up and cooking it right then. He looked at the ingredient list on a can of chili, asked me a few basic questions, and the rest was up to him.

Saturday was a crazy busy day for him, which included a "drive-thru" at the house for lunch (in other words, me running out the food I threw together to his car) and showing up an hour late for the party. It was my privilege of following strict orders to take and deliver the chili on time so it could be in the contest. If it wasn't for the chili, I may have finagled my way out of attending the party- only because it would just be Corban and me, no daddy. Luckily we have great in-laws that are really into Halloween and we just happened to visit them on Thursday night/Friday morning. They kindly offered us a darling costume that was super easy to have Corban dress in, meaning no work for mom. And this was the result:

And Jared, well he showed up just in time to try the chilis before announcing the winners. And he walks home with this:



Interesting enough, he didn't vote for himself. I somewhat predicted the outcome when talking with Liz the day before saying Jared would be making the Chili and he would probably win because this was his first time. He just happens to be really good at cooking without a recipe.

I really have had a great day with Corban. This adorable baby has even been more adorable today. It started at 4:30 am when he woke up wanting a bottle. He was VERY awake by the time I got into his bedroom. When I picked him up he was "talking" with more clear sounds (not actual words) than I have ever heard from him before, and he would kind of whisper while he was doing it. When Jared came to drop him off at the corner for sign waving, he told me of his similar observation, however, he said that he actually heard him mimic the word "stop."
Next adorable thing was at sign waving. This boy loves to be apart of the action. I hold him in the front carrier and he just squeals and screams as the cars are honking and zooming by. He likes to raise both arms in the air and swing them down quickly- I use this as an opportunity to tickle him and get the most contagious laugh out of him. On our evening waving, he ended up wearing himself out and fell asleep after me feeding him a bottle.
Back to the morning. He insisted upon skipping his morning nap to play with Nika. I had put him in the highchair for breakfast. He took a few bits of wheat toast and plain yogurt with applesauce and began his loud grunting tyrant. So I do the usual "all done" sign and he stops immediately and gives me a smile. I am so amazed at how fast he caught on to this sign, if only I was good at using more signs with him we could be having conversations by now. After cleaning him up in our usual way, which includes letting him sip water out of the palm of my hand while I attempt to wash his face, I shook his hands dry while singing Musikgarten's song Hands A Washing. Our favorite part is the "so now we'll have to shake them, shake them, shake them, shake them. So now we'll have to shake them, shake them til their dry." After that I sat on the kitchen floor with him trying to teach him to clap his hands. He loves it when I hold his hands and do it for him, but he has yet to do it himself.
At this point I decided it was eminent that I take a shower (I was still in sweat, but dry, gym clothes). I decided to take a shower/bath with Corban because he loves them so much and he was still very awake. That was fun! I usually am just on the side lines, watching him have all the fun. I think we both enjoyed playing water slide, big splashing, and waterfall from the pelican pitcher. It was tough deciding when it was time to get out.
Later in the day, while working on something in the kitchen I turned around to see Corban tackling his lion. It was ADORABLE watching him roll over with the lion in a tight grasp. I guess he really is learning from Nika. He does tackle Nika quite often, sometimes catching her off guard, but usually she knows it's coming.

I took him to see daddy at Poway GS after sign waving. Daddy was busy working on his computer and was being wrestless in my arms so I decided to meet him half way with the action. I would bounce him high in the air and bring him down quickly, and then repeat right away (an amazing workout for the arms). This had him laughing so hard. I couldn't stop just because his laugh was so adorable. We also had some time in the mirror, one of his favorite parts of the stores. He loves to look at himself and others in the mirror. It usually starts with studying the picture he is seeing, and then you see his face light up as he realizes who he is looking at.

Last one I am going to mention due to time was him trying to climb into the bathtub. He was so tired tonight, but was also very wired. It was just about 10:00pm and it didn't seem he would be willing to lay down anytime soon. He had followed me into the bathroom and crawled up to the bathtub, like usual. So I gave in, I started a bath for him. As I undressed him, he remained clasped to the side of the tub and proceeded to lift his leg up as if to climb the side of the tub. He actually does this almost everyday as I prepare his bath, but it so cute EVERY TIME! The bath was short lived because I took out at first sign of tiredness- rubbing the eyes as he moved toward the side of the tub, as if to say he was too tired to be in the tub any longer. Sure enough, he was in bed and asleep within 15 minutes of getting out of the bath.

Time to get some ZZZZZ's before Corban wakes up...or before I need to be up to wave signs- whichever comes first.

Missing Out!

I have been a dedicated Prop 8 sign waver for the past week, and today I have been defeated by sickness. It could be worse and just the fear of that has kept me home this morning. I am not so much worried about me as I am worried about Corban and Jared. I really would hate to get either of them sick right now...but I think Jared is already on his way.

So instead of standing on a corner this morning, I thought I would share excerpts of Liz Agle's "Prop 8 Center" post wave wrap-ups:

Wed. 10/15

Tonight's sign waving went well, though I must confess I was expecting a few more people. I had a blast with Cole Oross and his friend, Taylor, on one corner, while Jared and Amanda Crane (with Corban, bless his little heart and to-die-for eyes) and Amber Price covered the block kitty-corner to us. According to Cole and Taylor, we got 26 negatives reactions directed at our corner including thumbs down, mouthed "no's," shaking heads, screams and yells, birdies (not the nice ones you feed crackers and teach to speak), and one man who held up traffic to educate us about the folly of our ways. However, the positive reactions far outweighed the negatives. We were honked at and waved to, smiled at and whooped on, and praised and blessed. If you haven't tried this yet, you definitely need to come on down and stake out a corner with us. Especially if you can finagle a spot next to Cole and Taylor, they're a riot! Seriously though, all the bad stuff seems to just roll right off your back as you smile and wave back at the protesters, but when you get a positive reaction, you feel like you're on top of the world!

Fri 10/17 Morning

You must know that this morning at our stakeout by the 56 freeway entrance (right there at Carl's Jr and the car wash), we had 10 people show up!! 10!! I am such a proud Prop 8 mama, let me tell you.... Our numbers are growing and I am especially proud of those who are uncomfortable with doing this, but come anyway because they know how important it is. We got tons of honks, waves, thumbs up, head nods, and even an armored truck siren as he went by (I've never heard one of those before). You can tell that people really appreciate the effort we are making to protect marriage between a man and a woman. Some people even hang out their cars to yell "God bless you" as they drive by.

A simple list of reasons for you to shake off your timidity and join us on the corner tonight:

Emotional boost = What could be better than having countless people drive by waving, smiling, honking, and hollering their support for something you also believe in so strongly?

Mental boost = What could be better than standing on a corner with your friends, discussing Prop 8 and having your commitment to this cause be strengthened by a common bond

Physical boost = After three days of doing this morning and evening, I can honestly say that Prop 8 sign waving will give your arms the best workout they've ever had, bar none!!

Spiritual boost = This is where God wants you to be (and I don't mean sign waving, exactly - if you're out there doing phone calls or walking, you are also responding to His call to arms). I have not one single doubt about that. Period.

Fri 10/17 Evening

My dearest, fellow Prop 8ers,

This hour marks the close of the happiest day of my Prop 8 life thus far. I forgot to mention in my previous email today, that as we finished up our sign waving for the morning rush hour, a male pedestrian approached us and, while expressing his deep gratitude for our service, handed us a bag full of ice cold bottled water. He had driven by earlier, honking his horn and giving us thumbs up. Then he circled back and in a perfect gesture of camaraderie, offered his assistance to us by quenching our thirst. See, I told you there's an emotional boost here.

So, let's move on to tonight's little victories. As I set up camp on the corner this evening, the Wilcox family approached with some homemade signs made by our very own Tami. One sported a very important message "Prop 8 doesn't take ANY rights away" and the other served to, shall we say, rally the troops a bit. Well, really, the second had a two fold mission. In this simple request, "Honk if you like Prop 8," we were able to not only effect a cacophonous symphony of automotive horns, but we also eliminated the opposition's method of drawing attention to it's fingers and thumbs and frowns. Utterly and completely foiled, they were. You are brilliant, Tami! We were also blessed with a car full of youth who kept circling back to come through our intersection over and over blasting their horn and screaming out their windows in support of Prop 8. Bless them, whoever they are. I would love to adopt them.

And with her professional skills, here is Liz's recruiting ad:

Mon 10/20

So, you remember a couple (maybe 30) e-mails ago when I said I'd had the best day of my Prop 8 life so far? Well tonight, that day got trumped...big time. I arrived at Penasquitos Dr. and Carmel Mt. Rd. tonight and set up shop, getting the boys comfortable and safe in their stroller with snacks and drinks, then headed to the sidewalk armed with a Prop 8 sign in each hand. Enter Field of Dreams: "If you build it, they will come." Well, I didn't actually build anything, but I think through word-of-mouth and the positive experience of others, we were able to encourage a record breaking attendance at "the corner" tonight. As folks arrived in groups of twos and threes, my heart swelled and my spirit soared! Now, hang onto your seat because when you hear this number, it'll knock your socks off. Twenty eight! We had 28 people come out to wave Prop 8 signs tonight!! And all from our ward, no less! Just saying I was proud doesn't cut it. I was as proud as a peacock and as pleased as punch. To quote Mater, I was "happier than a tornado in a trailer park." Sheesh, 28 people! I remember when I was the only one standing on that very same corner the first day of sign waving...just last week! And, I also remember when Vicky told me that Mira Mesa had combined with Scripps Ranch their first time out and had 30 people. I sighed in envy then, but look at us now! We're holding our own, all by ourselves and I - am - just - so - proud!!

Apart from an overwhelming attendance, we also had an overwhelmingly positive response from the automobiles. Tons of honks and waves and thumbs up! Hardly anything negative, though I'm sure that's in part due to Tami's wonderful "Honk if you like Prop 8" sign. They just can't get the attention they want. :) Hooray! We have discovered that we need some new signs, though. A few people have asked what exactly voting "yes" would mean, so we've proposed a new sign that says "Yes on Prop 8 = one man + one woman."

Here were some pictures I (Amanda) took that night. Corban had a great time with Gus Zanini, to whom I am eternally grateful since my arms are already starting to really feel the burn from holding up signs.

We have now seen the opposition; however, we had no idea what their sign said. Those who were on that side with them said that it said "8= (scribbles because they messed up) Vote No on Prop 8". The latter portion, which was their point, was written in pencil. I don't know that they had much impact that night.

Tues 10/21

A fellow sign waver said to me the other day (or maybe it was this morning - my Prop 8 days sort of blur together), "Just think of all the stories we're going to walk away with from Prop 8." I have often thought the same. The defenders of traditional marriage are just pouring out of the woodwork in droves now. I want to be able to tell my children's children that I did all I could to protect marriage in 2008. This morning, I witnessed firsthand one of those inspiring stories of someone going the extra mile...literally.

Everyone meet Claire. Claire is now part of our e-mail list and is a most welcome addition. Claire showed up this morning about 45 minutes after we started. She came toting a "Yes on Prop 8" yard sign stuck to a stiff poster board. As her story unfolded, I was humbled by the presence of a Prop 8 giant. This woman had seen groups around holding support Prop 8 signs and she wanted to join in, but didn't know who to contact. So, this morning, she loaded her makeshift sign into her car and set off driving around until she found a group to join. Claire is from Poway!! We were thrilled to have her this morning and welcome her presence anytime she is able.

And that's the wrap-up. Liz has been such an example through this all. what she didn't mention about yesterday is that she had been up all hours of the night with a sick child. Nothing will stop this warrior!

She is also good to not dwell on the negative responses we receive, to which I will just make a few comments so those not living on the battle grounds can have an idea of how this might be difficult for the timid. We get plenty of middle fingers, sometimes subtle (one girl passed by rubbing her forehead with her middle finger) but most of the time very blatant, plenty of vulgar language, yesterday was the first time I heard someone yell "homophobes", and just a few loud and obscene remarks , one on Monday that was so descriptive that I believe gave every reason to vote YES (along the lines of "I should be able to marry my dog" and on he continued). Most of the negative response comes from a shaking of the head, shaking of the finger, a thumbs down, or no acknowledgement that we are there. The latter are what I see as being tolerant of people expressing their opinion and I greatly respect them for being respectful of us.

Haven't done that in a long time!

I just returned from working in our Del Mar store. I haven't actually worked a shift since before Corban entered my life- I did work a "Free Day" event, but I was in the back the entire time so I didn't work with customers. I forgot how fun it can be talking with happy people getting a delicious treat. I also don't remember being nervous working in my own stores! We got our new POS system in my last month of working and I never got comfortable with it...and today proved that!

Thanks to Liz and Dan for watching Corban while his mom and dad worked together. Sounds like they had lots of fun. I don't know about everyone else, but one of my favorite things about having other people watch him are the stories they have to tell when I pick him up. It is so fun for me to hear what amusing things he did for them, and that they are just as a amused as I am when he does it for me. Tonight they told me about him playing with the lid to his bottle- scooting it along the floor, banging it into the walls, and keeping himself entertained for a while. Every once in a while he would "pop up" in front of Dan, as if too see what he was doing- Corban would come around to the side of his computer and just watch him. Now, for us he is usually reaching for the keyboard, but maybe I wasn't aware of something Jared has taught him. He apparently also wanted to jump in the tub with their boys during bathtime. I forgot to mention that bathtime is one of his favorite things to do. In fact, just the other day when I allowed him to crawl up the stairs, once he reached the top he continued on into the bathroom and pulled himself up to the tub. He then just stood there, looking in at the empty tub, and the bath toys. It took remembering I had just changed his diaper and we had another meal to go through to prevent me from just throwing him in the tub that very minute.
Liz also shared with me his way of "playing" with a turtle she gave him. With actions she described his way of throwing it here and then there, and then back over here...it makes me wonder how much this child is learning from Nika. This reminded me of his playing with a little plastic bottle I had to give to him on Saturday. He had found the bottle on the stairs and once he got ahold of it I couldn't take it away. It was hard enough just "borrowing" it for a couple of seconds so I could empty the contents (massage oil) before he was drinking it. Anyway, he has been carrying this bottle around with him everywhere. On the tile you hear the scraping noise as he slides, smack, slides, smack, slides, smack. The "smack" is his other hand completeing the crawling movement. As he was doing this across the kitchen floor and Jared and I are observing, Jared gets his attention, to which he tries to come quickly. In the action he loses the bottle, but it takes him a few steps ahead to realize. So we see the wheels turning in his head as he stops, turns around, finds the bottle and then gets side tracked and just plays with the bottle, banging it on the floor, here and there. When he looks up at us again, the entire process is repeated- crawling towards us, loses the bottle, stops, turns around, picks up the bottle and starts playing again. Too bad I don't have this on video because it is much better than what I can describe in words!
So while I am on my favorite subject, let me share with you a few other things about Corban. He has 6 teeth! I was really nervous about 4 weeks ago when his upper teeth were coming in, but not the center ones. I feared him looking like a Vampire, though that may have made a great Halloween costume. It was only a few days after they had broke the skin that I could see the center ones pushing their way through. Jared said today that they are crooked. I am not so sure about that, but let's hope not!
He is becoming partial to his mother. If I am around, Jared has a little bit of trouble getting him to go to bed, or to be calmed down. As long as he doesn't see me he is fine. It is nice having him want to come to me- who can resist that charming smile as he reaches towards you! It is one of my favorite things during the day when he decides he wants me to pick him up. He is usually off doing his own thing, but he does reach a point where he wants me. This is when he will come tug on my pant leg and "ask" for me to pick him up.
Speaking of doing his own thing, I wonder if I am creating a problem for the future. During the week I really do allow him to have a lot of time for himself to crawl around and explore anything and everything he can reach. I occasionally come across items I have to move because he really shouldn't have them within reach. So when it comes to Musikgarten on Wednesdays, church on Sundays, or anytime when I need him to sit quietly, it is practically impossible- he wants to be down, independently exploring. Is this normal, and how can I best teach him to be able to sit with me.

Well, Jared just arrived home after finishing up closing duties alone...since I got to pick up Corban and come home after close. I am going to go be his girlfriend :)

It happened

So the "warning" about the stealing of signs was accurate. There were a bunch of signs in my neighborhood that were stolen on the said day of October 11th. Not ours because we watch it like a hawk...and now it is up on our balcony. It is so interesting to me that they preach freedom of speech, but don't allow it if it is in opposition to what they are campaigning. Even if we were campaigning against Free Speech, which we are not even coming close to doing, that should be allowed. Can someone help explain this to me?

My Views

What's a post without a picture?

It has been a while since I have made any comments on Proposition 8, or any comments for that matter. This is actually because we have been heavily engaged in the work. As it gets closer to the election, there is a great need of time to be put in by walking precincts (I didn't know what that meant until I was doing it). We will be contacting people in person for the next two weeks, and then the work is going to change to phone calls and encouraging and registering people to vote.

To share a personal experience: last weekend on our way to walk Prop 8 in Mira Mesa I finally broke down to Jared. Mind you, this was after a morning filled with four hours of General Conference and little sleep the night before. I had finally hit a point in my life where I was beginning to understand what I had only heard many others talk about. I was feeling the pressure of the many responsibilities I was to be fulfilling- walking for Prop 8, preparing a great Super Saturday for Enrichment, playing with Corban and being a great mother for him, taking care of my husband, and taking care of myself- and it was too much. I was feeling like I couldn't reach a point where I could say "I am doing what I can." I kept feeling like I should be doing more, but didn't seem to have the time to do so. I was upset when Jared's answer was to pray about it- not because I didn't agree with him, but because that seemed like too simple of an answer, and I also think I wanted to hear him say he was feeling the same in regards to our efforts for Prop 8. What I wanted to hear was validation for what I was accomplishing and that I really was doing all that I could do. When I told him that I was feeling like I didn't have time to take care of myself, he posed the question (not these exact words), "doesn't doing your responsibilities help you take care of you?" I negatively took this to mean I wasn't doing enough and I should be putting in more on Prop 8. Holding back tears, we got out to join others in the walk, Jared only joining us for an hour since he still had the Priesthood session to attend.

I arrived home from walking a little after Jared did feeling great! We finished a bunch of streets in those three hours, came across a lot of grateful individuals that are willing to help in some way, contacted a Priest that was looking for a way he could inform his congregation about this so we gave him sign/flyers/bumper stickers, and it didn't start raining until we knocked the last door! Miracles do happen. Jared came in and told me that he learned some great things in the Priesthood session, one being that he needed to attend to my needs and listen to me more. He always seems to find a way to take the blame. The truth of the matter, I really did need to pray and look at what I could do differently to have a different attitude. Not thinking much of it until today, I realized those feelings went away. I attribute that to being that we more clearly planned out our Prop 8 walking for the week, guaranteeing we put in at least 4 hours (this being the new goal given from the apostles). I wrote it on a sticky note and we have stuck to it the entire week. Not only have we got in the walk, but knowing when Jared would be home, I also cooked him meals this week. Additionally, we were able to take the Ryan's walking with us today to show them the ropes so they can go out on their own.

I think I was having those feelings because I really wasn't giving Prop 8 the attention I knew I should and could give it. Greater blessings have attended us this week as we have been out walking- it is easier to talk to people, more information comes to mind that I can share on an individual basis, and we have made new friends in the neighborhood. We have even got people asking us if they can get a sign or a bumper sticker. Oh, and we came across a young family where the husband is a baptized member, who became inactive before he got married. They have casually talked about maybe getting involved in the church because it is very family oriented.

As if this post isn't long enough, here is my introspection on how Prop 8 and the general presidential election have much in common. This came to me as I was watching Dr. Dobson, who I am not necessarily an advocate of, but I get weekly parenting tips from him on email (need all I can get) and this video interview came today. It is in support of everything I strongly believe in, namely marriage and family.

Here in California we are heavily involved in fighting for the preservation of marriage and family. This is the most I have ever been involved in any politics, though we do consider our fight more of a moral question rather than a political view. I have learned a lot (have a whole lot more to learn), met a lot of people that have been willing to share their views that both support and contradict my views, and have gained a stronger conviction of patriotism for our country.
One of the many answers we get in opposition to Prop 8 is that it is “discriminatory” to not allow them this “right”. I have been wanting to have an explanation for this, not that I would have the chance to share it with them, because they rarely give an opportunity to hear our side, but because I know that we are not discriminating. I found the answer in my understanding of the word “tolerance”. I believe tolerance to be a love and respect for all people as individuals, not to be a disregard and acceptance of all their behaviors. I believe there is a right and a wrong and we need to stand up for what right. The world seems to be changing the definition to be “accept everything”, therefore making things neither right nor wrong; however, there is an inevitable double standard to this definition, summed up in this oxymoronic bumper sticker that read: “Intolerance will not be tolerated”. We have personally felt this double standard in our campaign.
In this country where we are given the right of freedom of speech, I have to keep a careful watch over my sign for “Yes on Prop 8” because signs and bumper stickers have been removed in less than 2 hours after being placed. This was a portion of an email we received today:
“I was informed that beginning this weekend, 10/10/08, Democrat union activists will be dispatched statewide to collect and remove as many political signs as possible for Republican candidates and Propositions that they do not support. This includes any "Yes on 8" materials or yard signs that they can get their hands on. Since "Yes on 8" yard signs are due to arrive any day and to be delivered to voters, we want to be aware that signs which are unattended or are not brought in at night will most likely disappear, especially this weekend.(Derrick W. Roach, Candidate for California Assembly)”
Though this is very disheartening to hear, I still stand true to my belief that tolerance is a love and respect for others and I will continue to try to have that for all the mean and kind people we encounter during this campaign.
Dr. Dobson’s letter brought to light for me even more issues that are standing on this election. I wasn’t aware of the Supreme Court Judges that would/could be resigning in the following years, therefore being filled by the president at that time. If Obama is to choose those judges, we are up for a liberal reign of the land, which will have a great impact on the family unit, making Prop 8 in California something the entire nation is going to face in the next 4 years.
As we come down to the last weeks before the election, I hope that we are not passive in our efforts. Even if you are not involved in Prop 8, there is a similar battle being fought for the presidential seat. I use to be one of the many that figured I shouldn’t vote because I wasn’t well enough informed. I am definitely not allowing that to happen this time.
(Click here for additional information from the church on how we have been counseled and prepared for Prop 8 efforts. This was a great broadcast, I only wish it was the entire thing!)